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Fortune Cookies Fortunes not what they used to be

Sep 21, 2007

We picked up chinese food for dinner tonight.  It was for about 7 people, so it came in a big box with a brown bag full of fortune cookies.

So I was watching Letterman talk to Joe Biden (who seems to really hit on all 8 cylinders these days) eating fortune cookies and I noticed that these were some pretty stupid fortunes:

  1. Many Ideals are becoming Real
  2. The eyes believe themselves; the ears believe other people
  3. You will be advanced socially without any special effort
  4. You are the center of every group's attention
  5. You are deeply attached to your family and home
  6. An outstanding opportunity will soon present itself to you
  7. Get your mind set-confidence will lead you on
  8. Fortune cookie says; you will gain admiration from your peers
  9. You will be travelling and coming into a fortune

OK, not too bad, I'll get rich and my ego will become over inflated.  Then I started reading some more . . .

  1. Oedipus didn't have such a bad deal, what about you?
  2. You are soooo what you reap when you dress in sexy costumes
  3. The Young are not so restless, just young
  4. You will drink lots of caffeine and sleep like a baby
  5. Paradox is your friend, the exception to the rule is your enemy
  6. No flies on you, but mosquitoes are a different story
  7. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, Snort ketchup through your nose and they are appalled
  8. A bird in the hand is likely to result in the flu
  9. 3 steps forward, turn left, 4 steps forward, turn right 1.5 steps backward, bend down and pick up a $100 bill

WooHoo ed by Brett Bumeter at 10:01 PM  

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