Here's a quick Press Release that you can listen to about Donald Trump's recent announcement that he intends to marry Miss USA, Tara Conner.

Press Release from Satyre Wire December 22, 2006

The Donal To Marry Miss USA

Donald Trump announced today that he intends to marry Miss USA Tara Conner. 

He stated that he originally considered dismissing her from her role as Miss USA as he owns the company and didn't feel it would be appropriate to marry an employee and encourage nepotism.  Close friend and Larry King, who has been married 5 times, told Trump, "You already encourage nepotism by employing your kids.  Get real you Schmuck your a billionaire and look like a quack what do you care?" Said Donald when asked about his decision.

Early in the week the press had speculated that Donald was considering stripping Tara's crown after learning of lurid details about her personal life in New York City and viewing pictures from private investigators hired by NBC co owner of the Miss USA pageant.

Donald later stated, "I wanted to strip her alright, but I wouldn't start with her crown.  I could care less about the crown, I have a closet full of them.  How do you think I landed my last wife?"

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